I have got to get it together. I’m looking around the other day, and I realize I have — excuse my salty, sailor, rugby mouth — a sh*tload of bags. Between the ones out in the open, in the kitchen, the ones in closets, in the bedroom — you name a place, and I promise you, there’s a bag there. Small bag, large bag, extra-large bag, paper, plastic, brown, white, multi-colored…you need one? Chances are, I have it.
And here’s why this obvious “collection” of bags makes no sense. I will NEVER use them all. I don’t need the plastic bags for garbage. I buy garbage bags. What the h*ll? As a matter of fact, I have a big box of bags I purchased at Costco, and that’s 130 bags right there (because you know Costco doesn’t sell anything in small quantities).
Attention Glad Products Company: I love your Glad ForceFlex bags. My 130-count box is almost finished. Would you mind sending me a box or two, please? If not, I’ll take coupons. The Odor Shield ones are not necessary; plain ones are fine. Thanks.
Now, I know I’m not a hoarder, but I can see how there is a very slippery slope with this behavior. This is how things can get a l..i..t..t..l..e nuts. Have you ever watched that show “Hoarders”? Oh My God. I feel for some of those people. But, I cannot believe the way they live!
I throw away bags all the time. (sigh) Last fall, I got rid of four large handfuls of bags in bags, and somehow — don’t ask me how — I now have an overwhelming supply that needs to head to a landfill. And as for the supermarket bags, I actually have recyclable shopping bags that I take back and forth to the supermarket — at least 70% of the time — so, I’m not sure why I have accumulated so many. I must have a magnet of some sort on my body attracting these bags.
Now, don’t-even-get-me-started-on-the-plastic-containers. Are you freakin’ kidding me?! Tell me: If you have Glad plastic containers (you see a trend here — obviously, even “Reds” — my mother — likes Glad Products…Hello, Glad, are you out there? — because she sends my food back to New York in them), why, why, why, do you need take-out containers, butter containers, Chinese food soup containers (you know the one’s I’m talking about…the clear ones)). (sigh)
This just makes no sense.
An intervention may be in order: Seriously, how many paper and plastic bags does a person need?